And that, my friends, is the truth,

Congratulations to everyone who finished Febphotofest2019!! And big love to everyone who visited my  blog this month, who got involved, who commented, who followed me. To all of you who saw me and witnessed me and celebrated me, I appreciate you. Thank you.

See you in March.

​Muah!

​When I first took this picture, I liked it because I don't take many photos that imply spanking or submission and sometime's it's hot. There was just enough about the picture to make me keep it and think it had potential, but there was also a lack of finesse and some other element - maybe the inclusion of my hands would have helped? - to make it a finished piece. And the lighting was really problematic and almost unfixable.

The longer I looked at it, the more I thought it looked like an amateur porn outtake. So I tried to enhance that feel by brightening and flattening the lighting, which also brought out the somewhat wonky perspective of the fireplace in the background. And now... does it just look weirdly unintentionally amateurish? Like maybe I don't realize it's not that great? I can't tell. Doing something not great on purpose is tricksy and I don't think I nailed it here.

Either way, I posted it because sometimes we shouldn't take ourselves too seriously. 

Happy humpday! Only one more day of FebPhotoFest, can you believe it? We almost maaaade it...

This is obviously(?) a different version of the photo I posted for Sinful Sunday this week. 

This was my first pass at editing and it's very soft and bland and easy. It has soft core porn lighting and I gave myself a little bit of a California tan but overall it looks much less sexual than Sunday's black and white version. This version is more accessible but it also has hardly any impact. 

Sunday's version of the photo is by far my favorite interpretation. In fact it's one of my favorite Sunday pictures this year. It's stark and hungry and fixed, an effect achieved by way of the different black and white filters and also the border, It looks like a complete moment in time. Captured. Or trapped. And the quote gives me shivers.

I'm amazed by the way a picture changes in the editing process. Not just the obvious things like focus and light but the actual spirit and intent of the photo can swing 180 degrees. 

I've not thought much about editing up to this point. I mean, I've thought about it in technical terms like the way my skin looks or the cropping and composition but not the story. Not what a picture wants to say and how I can help bring that out. It's opened up a whole new world to me. 

The FebruaryPhotoFest is exemplified in this quote, I think. All of us who post these pictures of ourselves are learning to love ourselves and show that love to other people. We see ourselves differently by seeing ourselves on screen and sharing those views with others. And then we get to express that love for others who are also posting. 

This is my love round-up of just a few pictures and posts that have moved me this month:

http://mxnillin.com/that-ass-though/
They have been one of my most favorite discoveries this month, in no small part because of their enthusiasm for this project. And the best part of this post is their unapologetic enthusiastic self-love! The only reason any of us should post pictures of ourselves is to revel in the fact that we are the shit and MxNillin is most certainly the shit. Plus, as they point out, their ass looks scrumptious! And those panties are divine. 

https://thelexyexperiment.com/749-2/
I keep thinking about this stunning picture of Lexy's, the straps on her panties and the slats of the railing, the dreamy black and white, her "bedhead braids" and the overall feel that she's been captured candidly as she runs onto her chilly porch to look at something before scurrying back to the warmth of what I want to think is the kitchen behind her. There's a whole world going on in this photo and I love all of it. Plus her round bottom is peachy perfection. 

https://mollysdailykiss.com/2019/02/13/porn-art/
I've linked to this post before because it's another one I can't get out of my head. I'm impressed by Molly's bravery to post this picture and her wise words about porn and art and arousal and how tightly inextricably linked all of those things are for us humans. And then also the sheer pink allure of her cunt, its delicate ruffled oval shape emphasized by the fallen flower petals with their slightly crisper focus. It's exquisitely conceived, framed, and shot. Simply gorgeous.

https://adissolutelifemeans.com/2019/02/i-believe-i-can-fly/
Hy has posted a number of beautifully vulnerable posts this month and I love this one because I empathize with why it makes her feel vulnerable with its wide frame and the position of her body. I'll say to everyone else what I commented to her, boldness and bravery are sexy. And she is both bold and brave.

https://bluesubmission.wordpress.com/2019/02/15/hooked-on-predicament/
I'm enchanted by the idea of shibari. It's one of those sexual practices that makes for aesthetically beautiful pictures, like this one. From this perspective, I can actually feel blue's rope and it makes me shiver, with fear as well as desire. The perspective is also entrancing, standing over her, looking down and thinking about what comes next. 

http://pieces-of-jade.com/2019/02/17/smut-marathon-round-1-thoughts/
This picture of Jade's hits me in all the right places. I love her red shoes, the sexy business woman vibe (so hottttt) and the perspective. As a viewer, I feel like a sexy slave on my knees waiting for her attention. She certainly deserves it. And then there are her thoughts on the smut marathon, many of which resonate with me. The marathon is a tricky bit of business and I wish her all the luck with her writing! I look forward to reading more of what she creates.

This is but a small smattering of the glorious posts this month. I can't wait for everything that follows.

happy saturday lovelies

Obviously I have a cup of coffee in my hand and not a pen, but the sentiment still stands. I'm making time this month for quiet interludes and I'm using them to tamp down my anxiety about the future. The great thing about having no plans that extend past the middle of next month is that anything could happen. The terrible thing is that literally anything could happen...

But that's a problem for a different day.

I liked how this picture turned out. I wanted it to look like an old photograph from an actual film camera and perhaps it had been in a drawer for years. I think I succeeded in that.

​For comparison, here's the original.

Which actually wasn't bad. I love the gold light, the way it shines in my hair and the sun spots on my neck. But I'd already posted a mostly unedited picture from this series featuring that light, and I wanted a different look. I also wanted to put the focus on something besides the sunburst. 

So I filtered the shit out of it on Snapseed to bring out all the foreground elements and give it a border and got this really hardcore technicolor version

Which also wasn't bad. I like the way it put the emphasis on the cup and created that particolored sky. But it was also a lot of everything. And so bright,

So I fed it through a few more filters to soften it and grey it down, messed with the highlights and added a bit of grunge to look like it had been handled and pushed around.

​Et voila. 

I've said it before but the fun part this month has been the editing process. I've definitely ranged more widely than I ever have to create pictures by editing rather than just post pictures created in my lens. I have so much more to learn but it's been great training for my eyes. 

Have a good thursday everyone. Definitely click on the lips below and go see other bloggers participating this month. I'll do a shout out post soon with some of my favorites. 

I love the word cyclonic but how often does one get to use it in a sentence? Not often enough, clearly. 

As Lexy pointed out, this midpoint in February is when daily posting feels tough.  For me it's not just the posting, it's finding ways to make my photos look unique and not like one long variation on a theme. 

I took this picture and several others in the same spot in my hotel room with the window as a background. I like most of them but they all have a similar feel so I'm searching for ways to edit and crop them so they each have their own personality. The tricky part is that I'm still me and I still like what I like so I'm inclined towards the same kinds of filters, crops, poses and lighting effects. I'm doing my best to break those habits this month. ​Molly's been a good inspiration as it's clear she's experimenting widely with her filters, especially on her IG pictures. 

When I look back at my Febphotofest posts last year, there's very little resemblance between that month and this month. My work feels much more intentional this year. It's lost a sense of spontaneity but I'm not sure that I mind that. Some of my current pictures still have that feel of a candid moment caught on camera but they're fewer than the ones that feel posed and specific. 

I'm doing a bad job of describing this. But perhaps you all know what I mean.

Posting every day this month has also given me cause to wonder why I'm doing this. Who I'm trying to reach and what I'm trying to say. I'm still not sure. In the way that I'm not sure what this blog wants to be. If Charlie Powell hadn't already taken the name and used it so well, I'd borrow hers because mine has certainly become a Sex Blog (of sorts...). 

How can a blog that only ever features my (mostly) naked body not be a sexual space? And yet... 

Curious thoughts for a Wednesday. 

xo